II

 

 

“Did it hurt?” Valerin asked, leaning in to see past the translucent weave of Ailon's blindfold. He wanted to get a closer look at those green eyes which glowed softly behind the organza. But more than anything, he wanted a closer look at the Immortal's dimly lit, pulsating tattoos.

“Did what hurt?” Ailon backed away from the bird, his lips twisting into an uncomfortable grimace.

“Learning.” Valerin breathed, still inching forward, trying to get a better look at the dim, pulsating glow of the spells.

“What do you think?”

“I don't know. That's why I'm asking you.” Valerin admitted. “I've read about your kind, how your magic takes hold of you and tries to devour you from within the moment any of you show potential. In the library in Sanctuary, there was a book there, it said your kind slowly go blind from learning those spells. Is that true?”

“Well, I'm blind now, if that proves anything about your reading,” Ailon deadpanned. “As for the devouring from within part. Let me ask you something little bird--”

“I am not a little bird.”

“Does it hurt when they throw you into the sacred fires? Does it hurt when you lose your memories?”

Valerin involuntarily fingered a braid and thought hard about the question. Was there pain when the sacred fires cleansed him? He couldn't remember. All he had left of his past life were the long locks of red hair braided and woven in a language he could barely understand. Anything else related to that past life had been burned away from his mind to make room for the memories of the current one. Did it hurt though?

“No,” the Phoenix finally answered after a long pause. “It's just...numb.”

“Numb?”

“Like a void. We fill it up with memories as the years pass. And when we start to forget, it's our time to be reborn.”

Ailon let out a long sigh after that explanation. “I envy your kind. Being able to throw away everything once it gets hard must be so nice.”

Valerin stared incredulously at the Leviathan. “Have you any idea how hard it is to rebuild a life after going through those flames?”

“And have you any idea what it's like to lose sight of all that is beautiful in the world? Do you have any idea what it's like at all to feel pain?” Valerin shot back, the spells on his body pulsating brightly, glowing orange and red. “You want to know what learning felt like? It felt like having a blade rip through your muscles to the very bone every waking moment until all you can do is pass out from the pain. Then, from the moment you wake up, you do it again and again until you no longer faint. You do it until you become blind with the pain and the magic becomes one with your bloodstream. That's what learning is like.” Ailon panted slightly when he finished his rant. His deep breathing seemed to echo throughout the dining space which had gone dead silent during his outrage.

Valerin had never heard of this way of learning. It utterly fascinated him how different the Leviathan learned. More than anything, he was fascinated by how those tattoos glowed in accordance to his moods. There was no way for him to ever come close to comprehending what Ailon had to goly through. The more he thought about it though, the more he wanted to know.

“Ailon. Teach me your magic.”

“What?”

“You heard me. Teach me.”

ӁӁӁ

 

The food set before the two Immortals smelled fantastic. Valerin had been wondering what the Mortals ate after he had begun to feel hunger pains earlier in the evening. Just as he was about to take a bite out of the stew, he was distracted by Ailon's motions. The Leviathan had taken his spoon and started to tap it against the objects on the table. He took a pause after every three or four taps, seeming to commit to memory where things were and what noise they made. Ailon repeated these motions every time he needed to reach for something other than the bowl of food set in front of him.

“What? You're not going to eat?”

Valerin quickly stopped staring at Ailon and hurriedly dug into the bowl of food. The intense amount of salt burned his tongue and he quickly spat it back into the bowl, vigorously rubbing his sore tongue along the roof of his mouth.

“What's wrong?” Ailon asked. “Not to your liking?”

“Too much salt.” Valerin grumbled, stirring the steaming bowl of stew. “How do you manage to eat that?”

“You forget the Sea itself is salty, this is actually quite bland.”

Valerin felt the ghostly burn on his tongue intensify at the very thought of having something even saltier than what was placed before him.

“You'll get used to it. Just eat it. Starving isn't going to do you any good, little bird.”

The Phoenix sighed and once again placed a spoonful of the stew into his mouth. He tried to ignore the burning sensation from both the salt and the heat of the food. He chewed and encountered a sensation unknown to him. “What's in this stew?”

“Probably some vegetables and meat of some sort.”

“Meat? As in flesh?”

“Mortals cannot live on clouds and vegetation like you little bird tribes. And anyways, there needs to be a way for them to dispose of the bodies the Hunters bring back. No point in it going to waste. I think it's antelope tonight. It's got quite a good flavor once you get over the idea that it used to be a member of some community.”

Valerin blanched at how calm and collected Ailon seemed the whole time he was giving the Phoenix this little tidbit of information. It explained everything he saw earlier in the market square. How the Hunters didn't have a corpse with them even though the blood was fresh from their kill. He felt his stomach sink and warm bile at the back of his throat. Blindly, the Phoenix stumbled out of his seat and towards the doorway. When he took a deep breath of the cool night air, his stomach finally revolted and the Phoenix threw up whatever little he had swallowed along with a good helping of stinging bile.

He continued to vomit out bile until nothing else would come out. He could hear Ailon's shuffled footsteps from behind him.

“Disgusting isn't it?”

“How... How do you live like this?” Valerin couldn't find the strength in him to stand up straight. His mind raced with thoughts of Mortal clans eating one another as calmly as Ailon had been doing just a few moments earlier.

“You get used to it.”

Valerin turned to look at the Leviathan. The spells glowed oddly in the dim light of the night, it didn't seem as though they gave off any light as they did in the tavern. They seemed to absorb it instead. “You're insane.”

“So is any Immortal who decided that it was a good idea to leave the safety of his clan.” Ailon shrugged and gently patted Valerin's back. “You've got so much to learn, little bird.”

“I don't think I want to learn any more.” Valerin admitted, suppressing the urge to vomit again.

ӁӁӁ

 

“What did you leave Sanctuary for?”

Valerin knew the question was going to come up between the two of them eventually. “I left so I could keep my memories.”

“You know there's no rebirth after dying like this?” Ailon asked, sitting down on the bed and undoing the organza strip of cloth around his eyes and meticulously laying it down on the tiny table next to the bed.

“I can't let go of these memories. They filled up more than that numb feeling.”

“She was Mortal wasn't she?” Ailon asked, staring at Valerin from across the room.

“You can read minds?”

“No, I read patterns in silly little creatures such as you, little bird.” The Leviathan's unchanging gaze and expression unnerved Valerin. It sent creeping shivers up and down the the bird's spine the way he never blinked. For once, he wished that Ailon would cover his eyes, and stop calling him 'little bird.'

“Yes, she was Mortal.”

“And what made her so special that you're willing to sacrifice your immortality for?”

“She told me something.” Valerin paused and contemplated continuing, Ailon's blank stare pressured him into giving away more. “She said she had found the path to the ends of the world.”

“To where the goddess Jinana resides? Intriguing.”

“Why did you leave? What's your reason for leaving the Sea?”

In the dim light of the room and against the soft glow of Ailon's tattoos, Valerin could have sworn the Leviathan's expression had changed if only for a brief moment.

“I thought if I left the depths of the Sea, I could see the sun again. I guess I was wrong. It's as dark as ever.”

“To see the sun. You left the palace Jinana graced you with to see the sun.”

“Yes. Is there something wrong with that?”

“What are you hiding?”

“You think I'm hiding something?” The barest trace of a smirk moved across Ailon's face.

“I do. I think I've given my fair share of information. I think it's time you shared yours.”

“Well, if I am hiding something; you'll find out soon enough, little bird. Get some sleep for now. You need to be rested for tomorrow.”

Valerin wanted to ask why but stopped himself. He feared if he asked any more, his mind wouldn't be able to take it all in. Living among Mortals and their barbaric ways was enough of a strain on his mind that anything more might have driven him insane. He pulled his knees up close to his body and rested his head in the crevice between his chest and knees. The Phoenix breathed in deeply, trying to calm his mind. As he did, he caught the scent of the Sacred Fires that still clung to his clothes. Strangely enough, he felt calmer once he had something familiar to take his mind off of the chaos he had so impulsively thrown himself into.

Perhaps the next day was going to be quite long if it was going to be anything like his first day on Earth.